12 deep questions to ask yourself when you feel disappointment

  1. Do I think that failure is the end of my ability to succeed? What is my role in this situation?
  2. Do I feel like I can't do it all?
  3. Did I have too many expectations?
  4. What can I do to feel better right now?
  5. Is this day going in the opposite direction of my expectations?
  6. Did my expectations get met recently? If not, how could I change my expectations?
  7. What am I doing to move closer to meeting my expectations?
  8. What are my expectations for this day?
  9. Why am I disappointed?
  10. Do I feel this disappointment because something did not turn out as well as I had hoped?
  11. Do I feel like this disappoints me because someone is not living up to my expectations/understanding of them?
  12. Do I feel disappointed because someone has not been sensitive to my feelings or needs?

11 tips on how to deal with disappointment

  1. You're not the center of the universe.
  2. You have what you need to handle it when it happens to you.
  3. Try to find a way to reframe the situation so it no longer bothers you as much or at all (this can be accomplished by using either humor or seeing someone else’s point of view).
  4. Talk to someone about your feelings and disappointment.
  5. Realize that what you want might not be possible or even desired by others.
  6. Misfortunes happen to everyone, and some are worse than others. Luck evens out over time.
  7. Keep in mind that the way you typically define success might not really matter.
  8. It could be you next time.
  9. Crisis is inevitable in life, so you might as well prepare for it when it does happen to you by working on developing your coping skills now instead of waiting until it happens and then wondering why you don't have them.
  10. Consider all the other things in life that help make up your life – like friends, family, work, pets, hobbies and experiences – and try to find the silver lining in them instead.
  11. Accept that not getting what you want is a natural feeling. You're not the center of the universe.

How disappointment affects you

The inevitable feeling of disappointment is often caused by the anticipation of a certain event or situation. Anticipation is the act of expecting, and in turn, lowers the incidence of disappointment. If people know they are going to be disappointed by a particular movie, for example, then they can go in with that thought in mind and be less likely to be disappointed. A person can also feel disappointment if they don't like their situation. For example, if someone isn't getting what they want or when they want it, then they'll feel disappointed.